Drugs, Drugs, And More Drugs.

O.k... I'm really sorry for not making a whole lot of sense in the previous post but I'm on painkillers and anti-inflammatories, thus my head seems to want to float around, about two feet above my neck!  I'm not really sure what I was trying to say this morning when I wrote that, except that wpi doesn't always work as a reliable measurement for gauge in knitting. Why anyone would want to use wpi for knitting instead of knitting a swatch and checking the gauge is beyond me anyway.....But I'm on so many drugs for my cold and bad back which doesn't seem to be getting better, that I'm really in quite a bit of a fog. So if you read the previous post and went,  "Huh?!" then I don't blame you. I did too.

I think I'll go blow my nose and have a bit of a lie down now...... : /

For Those Who Like To Spin

I'll say sorry now to those of you who read this blog and are not spinners or knitters, because this post is all about a topic which has confounded me for a very long time.

Each morning I wake up and after having gotten breakfast for everyone I sit down at the computer and read the news, the weather, and then Knitting Daily which is an e-newsletter that I subscribe to. Sometimes it's really not interesting and sometimes it is. This morning was one of those mornings that was really interesting. They were talking about w.p.i. (which, for those of you who insist on reading this even though you are not a spinner, is wraps per inch).  Not many knitters use wpi but this morning there was quite and enlightening article about w.p.i.  Basically the gist of the story was that a lady who was confounded by wpi decided to test how reliable it was. She made wpi measures out of firm paper printed with a graph of 1/4 inch grid. Then she gave them to several fellow knitters. She handed each of her subjects a length of yarn and had them wrap the yarn around 2 inches. She was careful to tell them not to wrap too tightly and not too loosely. The strand had to be touching but not squeezed or squashed. Then she did this with several different strands of yarn. Each time her subjects were given the same kind of yarn. The wpi measurements that they got were very different, and none of them were consistently high or consistently low. Nope, their wpi measurements were all over the board.

I have always felt that w.p.i. was an unacceptable measurement. I wouldn't mind trying this experiment myself. I would like to test these results.  For a knitter following w.p.i. it can be a really big problem when using a different yarn from what is being used in the actual pattern.

In the last few days, while I have been nursing my back and trying to rid myself of phlegm, (yes, the first cold of the season) I have been looking at a lot of knitting patterns, especially in Vogue Knitting, which I have subscribed to many years. Vogue knitting has one problem.... that is that they are printed and published in New York and they seem to think that nobody lives outside of New York and that we can all run out and buy the type of yarn specified for the project with ease. Now all of us who live in the North, in rural setting know how laughable this is. But as I was perusing the pattern yesterday I thought, wouldn't it be nice if I could spin that yarn.

For spinners w.p.i. as well as t.p.i. and a.o.t. are absolute musts. Angle of twist will determine how the yarn handles, w.p.i. will give the right guage. Without them you're shooting in the dark.

My wish is that all knitting publications including Vogue Knitting and Interweave Knits, the two knitting giants of the world, would publish all patterns with yarn resources.... and that include t.p.i., w.p.i., and a.o.t. They way it is easier to duplicate the yarn. It might be good to include the number of plies (which usually is on the label though I have come across some labels that don't include the number of plies) and the type of yarn and percentage of any blends in the yarn wouldn't hurt either.

So w.p.i. well it might not be a reliable way of knowing whether or not it will work in a pattern but it sure is important if you're going to duplicate a yarn.... besides if you measured your w.p.i. now and got one thing and then measured the same yarn later in the day and got something else then you would have to worry!

How To Figure Out When Summer Is Over

1a. Daughter #1 comes home from school with a cold.

1b. Mother (that's moi) catches the cold and gets really congested.

2. Teapot goes off into the bush on the weekends with a gun.... looking for moose or elk.

3a. The bedroom windows remain closed...... even at night.

3b. The spider webs around the outside of the above window are visible because of morning frost.

4. The bright morning light does not wake us anymore.

5a. I begin to think about slippers and s---ks!

5b. I begin looking at thousands of s--k patterns  online and picking out all the favorites that I will never knit.

6. Going outdoors means looking through the closet for something to put on over your regular clothes.

7. Knitting is a pleasure and not a hot sticky pass time.

8. The Sears Christmas catalogue shows up and you actually feel like looking at it.

9.  You have to turn on the lights around supper time.

10 a. The grass turns green.

10 b. It snows...... waaaah! All the mountains are white in the back country.... we've been watching the mountains now for over a week and they turned white three nights ago and now the forecast is calling for snow here today.....

Best Laid Plans

Right well my work was supposed to go in the mail today. It is still sitting on the coffee table as I have put in the worst 24hrs with a really bad back.... at least I am hoping that is what is going on. Since the trip down the river in late August I have been carefully nursing what was up to that point a back that would only give problems occasionally but lately (since the trip) it has done a complete nose dive and is giving me trouble like never before... and even medication is doing nothing. For 4 days after the trip I could barely walk with a bad case of sciatica that stemmed from a prolapsed disk in my lower spine which I have known about for years. It seemed to clear up and then yesterday evening it came back.  But this time along with the sciatica came a really bad case of spastic muscles in my lower left leg calf. My leg does not want to hold me up. My muscles in that area are permanently contracted and they will not ease up. I have tried the new bath and it feels lovely while I am in the tub...but the minute I lift myself out... I am back to square one. Going up steps has become a lesson in patience as my left leg will not work.... basically what is happening is the nerves that exit my spinal cord at the site of the prolapsed disk are being squeezed. They are being slowly and inexorably damaged. I have seen a specialist about this problem and he has told me two things which will affect any decision I make regarding my future back issues...

1. I have had already three surgeries in this area. This means there is an abundance of scar tissue. Scar tissue for a surgeon is like a mine field. The specialist will not even contemplate corrective surgery, which involves a spinal fusion, without an MRI..... I am seriously claustrophobic. I tried to do an MRI a few years ago and I made it in to my nose.... then panicked.... I couldn't breath... I didn't stop running until I got to the great outdoors. (I'm not kidding!) If ever I try to go back in that machine again I will need serious drugs to get me through.... like, knock me out drugs. I also have a fear that an MRI (magnetic resonance imager) will turn me into a human magnet since I have a 15 inch steel rod in my back. Going into my back for the surgeon, without an MRI is like traveling through a mine field blind folded and I could be left in a wheel chair.... this scares the $h!t out of me!!!

2. I was advised that since I already have 15 spinal fusions for spinal scoliosis that having another spinal fusion would mean a lot more limited movement in my back. Already my spine has limited movement and adding the one at the bottom would mean that I might not be able to turn... swivel.... you get my drift. To turn around I would have to turn my complete body. Also I would be that much more ramrod straight..... there would only be 4 discs left absorbing shocks and that would seriously alter my lifestyle so basically I want to seriously think about this surgery before going through with it.... the doctor said that I really need to postpone it as long as I can.

It has been 8 years since the last surgery.... but with my leg now starting to go spastic I'm thinking that surgery is definitely in my future and probably nearer than I think.... that is if I can face the dark minuscule hole that is the MRI machine.

So the plan is to drug myself for the next few days with serious quantities of anti-inflammatories, muscle relaxants, and pain killers, hope that this pain goes away soon and stays away, for at least 6 months. I will also try really hard to get a decent night's sleep so that I can function. Then I will get my books in the mail to my instructor as soon as I can get to the post office... which will happen before the weekend since I will call in the help of Teapot or Fadder if I have to.

Amen to best laid plans.

Tee Hee Dingle Dork!!!!!

I think I am a little punch drunk... it is 10:04 p.m. and I'm done. Tee Hee... giggle giggle!

Level 3 that is!   I just packaged it up for the mail...... It goes in the mail tomorrow...... : ) a bigger grin you could not see.... I think I'm smiling so much that I'm lighting up the night with the sheen from my teeth..... been at it all day today and got a nice 2ply and then on my first try I got my 3 ply..... it's not perfect but I'm happy with it... the tpi is bang on even if the grist is off.

Now I just have to wait for my mark.... argh!

I think I'll go take a bath....... except I'm so tired I might drown..... maybe I'll get Teapot to hold me up.... hee hee hee hee ha ha haha ha! See I told you I was punchy.....!

Enough About That....

Level 3.... I'm really ready to jump!

Still on that first commercial yarn...I can't get the grist right. Argh! I am now on the sixth try.  If I get the grist right then I get the tpi wrong... if I get the tpi right then I get a lot of inconsistencies... Oh I am sooo tired of it. Today I will try a different yarn for my 2 ply commercial yarn...either that or I will give the two ply a break and try the 3 ply. I wanted this in the mail today.... well, you can see how successful I was at that..... so enough about that!

It is raining again today after another full day of rain.... I've never seen such weird weather. What we are getting is what we usually get in the spring. Weird!  We even lost the power on Saturday night.... very strange weather. Enough about that....

I have been wanting to say welcome to the two new followers on my follower list. Every so often I will go looking for blogs that I enjoy and I hope you find things here that you enjoy too.....

Dinner at the parents place last evening was interesting....(and the fact that I am mentioning it here must mean that it was superlative)... I gave the parents an overview of what I had written on my blog yesterday.... To show you all how the world has turned up-side-down, my parents in a complete switch from their normal habit, agreed with each other and said that I was completely wrong!  I was terribly happy because I gave them something to be united about and that is rare. : ) I came away from their house with (almost) a smile on my face...... it was worth baring my soul to the world on a topic that is so controversial just to see them as a united front.  It was also good to get a different perspective. Interesting how their generation sees things so differently... the gist of their argument was that they both valued the ditch digger as much as the lawyer.... (actually when I thought about it I couldn't disagree with them but then lawyers are such bottom dwellers not given a whole lot of respect either... and they do have their own jokes!) Anyway maybe it is a generation thing.... Mudder said that when she was young women who went to work were not given any respect or value... women were expected to stay home with their children so it has turned around just in one generation... interesting! Still though a little liberal arts can't hurt really.  Maybe it will make us all a little more open to our fellow people.... Enough about that....

Hi ho hi ho I'm off to try those commercial yarns again.... it is a good day for it... rain, rain, rain, dull, dull, dull, spin, spin, spin... maybe I should drink some wine, it might make my spinning better!.... too bad I'm allergic to it..... : ( ... well enough about this..... I'm off...

Liberal Arts vs The New World

I'm listening to CBC radio this morning... a past time that takes a lot of my time since Teapot and I do not have a hook up to television channels. Michael Enright is having an interesting interview with a Professor of Liberal arts, Martha Nussbaum... as an aside she is an American, not that that has any real significance other than requirements in American Universities may be different than in Canadian.... If you have read my Background Information then you know that I studied the liberal arts in university some twenty years ago. Philosophy was my major area of study and even though I received honours in my degree and a lovely little scholarship, even though it was one of the most exciting times of my life, - one of the most important seasons of growth and openness to new ideas for me, it did not provide me with the tools to go out in the world to get a job. And jobs are significant to our intrinsic value... at least that is the way the world acts.

Begin rant:
I have had a difficult time all through my adult life with maintaining value in the world of modern day society. I, as an unemployed, housewife (which to me is a derogatory term) have little or no value. I do not work so I DO nothing other than raise my children... which for all intents and purposes does not hold  value.  It irritates me no end when people say, "but you are raising your children.... and that is of value", and then act like you haven't a brain in your head. The person who works in a high powered job with a 6 digit salary is of much more value to society than I am. They too, raise children but maintain a high powered job while I sit on my derierre at home sweeping floors and cleaning toilets..... They hire a maid.

But that doesn't mean that I don't have significantly deep thoughts... that doesn't mean that my life is directionless or purposeless. I fear our society has entered a new age of darkness where we place value more on survival than on any other directive in our lives.

 I do realize that we need money to survive and that the more money we have the more likely is our ability to survive.... at least in this day and age where food, shelter and clothing are attained via money.... ahhh, we come down to it... don't we... and I know this is going to make me sound like an anti-capitalist.....but I'm not. I do believe in chasing after your dreams and if that includes making $600,000.00 a year then go for it.... but what we have done is changed our society so that it is no longer free.... it is mandatory that we seek the highest amount of money that we can, in order for our lives to be important. If we do not then we are passed over as "less than" not "more than".  Unfortunately we look up to those who have big houses, fast cars, big screen TVs , and three week vacations in exotic locations, as our foremost thinkers, leaders,.... and they, and only they, are successful at life.

Yin yang reigns supreme right now.... to be honest.... there is a part of me that believes too that survival through accumulation is a most important goal.... I have been steeped in that philosophy so it is difficult to think otherwise and perhaps we are wired as, primarily, animals to survive at all costs.  There are moments when I set aside the fact that quads permeate the air with pollution, and covet terribly the joy of those people speeding by my house on sunny Sunday afternoons down the trails laughing boisterously as they speed through the forest on those very fun vehicles... (that's just one small example of what I covet) but what it comes down to is a differentiation between need and want.... between  self-centered-ness and social conscience.  I don't need a quad, I can't afford a quad, and would I want one if I could?  I hope not.... they are vehicles that, though use low amounts of gasoline to get someone from one place to another, are terrible polluters of the air due to lack of emissions control, and have been known to decimate terrain over which they travel.

I am not a socialist, though I do believe that we are all a part of a global family and that caring for those around us is important..... and that includes recognizing the intrinsic value of all human beings.  I choose not to work.... therefore I have landed in the pool of snakes that makes me a "less than"!

So, to talk about Martha Nussbaum's philosophy,... she believes that the liberal arts are an important part of a university education. That studying Socrates, and Plato, and ethics,.... Heideger, and Kant, and lagalism will make better societies..... I'm not so sure it will.  Value is not placed on these ideas until we come to them of our own accord.

I would like to see education and consciousness of social liberalism start prior to University. Young men and women should be talking about their feelings of fitting into the society of their schools long before they reach the age of majority. For starters it would help to lessen bullying. We begin at such an early age to marginalize our youth.... we force on them the inhibitions that we hold ourselves and  in so doing give them the tools for a life of doing the same to others. Girls are taught at such a young age to bare their skin in an effort to appeal to the opposite sex..... boys are taught that showing emotion is wrong.... and all in the name of value.  We value less the girl who wears blouses that cover their throat that wear big glasses... that has acne... We value less the boy that cries at movies.... that is ashamed that they are not sports oriented.

We are all different.... and we should be taught from the earliest consciousness to accept the differences among us. No one is less valued for the Fisher Price toy they own.... no one one is less valued because they pee in their pants.... (yes it goes as far back as that).

Will it change? Perfection is not possible.  Can we be better? Absolutely. The next time you meet someone who has different ideals think, "Are they so different from me....?"

If you ask someone what they want out of life.... I'll bet you, they'll say something like this.... People who care about me.... enough to be comfortable..... a happy and healthy life... respect and trust..... and a feeling of intrinsic worth.

Not so different now are we.