When I was a kid I didn't think I was very smart. But as time went on I began to think that I wasn't so dumb after all. This was due to the fact that I had a really good memory and was able memorize things fairly easily. I also had excellent observation skills. So I began to notice that people around me would often infuriate me when they didn't "know" what I knew. My sister was one of these people. I remember playing cards with my sister when I was a kid and getting completely p'd off because her turn would come and she would sit there for ages before she would finally make her move. It infuriated me no end because she was unable to "see" the outcome of all possible moves without really studying them. I even called her Ding Bat all the time which makes me feel really bad now. We found out later that my sister has MS and that it greatly affects her memory and her ability to concentrate.
As I got older I discovered that if I actually took the time to study, memory work was fun.... in grade 11 I actually memorized my Social Studies text book cover to cover. A lot of good it did for me because when it came time to write my public exams I failed miserably on the section on current affairs because at the time I hated listening to the news. If I passed my exam at all (I'm not really sure if I did because of the Bell curve and figuring out Bell curves just about on-does me because it is so boring... but considering how stund I am, maybe figuring out Bell curves would be a good lesson for me!) it was because I probably got full marks on the actual history part of the exam.
I didn't want to go to University because all that studying was daunting.... imagine having to spend hours pouring over books sucking up all that knowledge. So I went to college instead to study becoming a Travel Counsellor.... which turned out to be completely ludicrous since the need for Travel Counsellors was completely redundant within a decade of my finishing the program. I hated my time there but finished the program because I was not a quitter. After I finished that program and couldn't get a job (mostly because I was so shy that I had a really hard time making any kind of impression on anyone), I decided to go to University after all. I loved it. I loved the social part of it for sure... it was great. But I also loved the study part of it too. I graduated with an honours degree. Basically all that means is that you do more courses in your area of study and you have to get above 80% in all of them. I did that no problem (except, if I'm honest, in logic... which was double dutch to me... and eventually I did it again to bring my mark up and it made a whole lot more sense the second time around... I do have a tendency to have to repeat some courses to get my marks up where I want them... sounds familiar eh?). So I entered my adult years feeling really accomplished and ready for the world... Like I was seriously smart. I even thought I was smarter than Teapot... (he was stund you see because he had failed out of University trying to get macro economics under his belt). I have since realized that his intelligence far outstrips mine. Though he is not the most intuitive person, his ability to retain the things that he has read is phenomenal especially if it is a piece of information that is completely useless to anyone. And his wit scares me at how fast it is sometimes... if wit was a measure of intelligence then Teapot would be a genius and Einstein would look like a monkey.
So it has been a really slow process coming to terms with the fact that I have an extremely over-inflated ego and that in actuality I'm just of average intelligence and at times quite stund myself.
The most recent blow to my ego and a lesson in humility was discovering that I couldn't spell bight/byte/bite. Teapot, in all his simple smartness, informed me that bight is a geographical and nautical term for a loop of land or a loop in a rope as when knot making. Byte was the computer thingy and to chow down is bite. Well who knew. I thought bight was chowing down in traditional English spelling, and bite was the barbarised Americanized version of chowing down and also could be used for the computer kind. Forget byte altogether....
I, being a good Newfy, should have known bight was a term that many Newfies use for a loop of land like a harbour.... I've heard it aplenty in Newfy music.
And so you see, in all humbleness, I bow to the Gods of knowledge and fully submit to my dumbness and stupidity. I am a slave to my ego and really should get the darn thing chipped down a bit...
But to the whole world I say bite me.... and not bight me or byte me....
If you're stund and you know it clap your hands (clap clap)
If you're stund and you know it clap your hands (clap clap)
If you're stund and you know it and you really want to show it
If you're stund and you know know write on a blog....
Then everyone will know just how stund you really are....
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