Yesterday I had a pile of work to do.... today I have the same pile of work to do. I have a commission that has to be completed by no later than tomorrow. All day yesterday I read my book... and while it was a good book I still had a commission to finish. Now this is not any commission this is a commission for a friend's wife's birthday... which is tomorrow. I have to get this done. So I didn't. Not only that but I didn't get my bookmarks finished. Today will be doubly busy as I have to get this done even if it means pulling an all nighter. It HAS to be finished. So why am I sitting here now doing this instead of working on my commission. Actually, I just looked up a picture of a Great Blue Heron and it looks like it won't be too hard to pull that off. I'm felting a jacket and embellishing it with a Blue Heron or two as time allows. A few reeds thrown in will make it look beautiful... meanwhile my bookmarks sit unfinished and they will have to be attended to today as well as the deadline for them is tomorrow. I am supposed to have a bunch of mini clothes done tomorrow, for decorating the Elves Christmas tree to be auctioned off but this is not a priority as I don't always support that function. I guess I'm here doing this because I like to write. This blog is an outlet for that form of creativity. What it comes down to is that deaadlines cause pressure and I hate pressure. I will always pick something fun over something that creates tension. What does that say about me?
Like I said, I hate deadlines. Even when I was in university I had trouble getting things finished in time to meet deadlines. My profs would often cringe when they saw me coming because they knew I was seeking an extension. What I need to remember is that sometimes extensions are not a part of the real world. It is difficult to get inspired until the date looms and then I work like a demon. If I could motivate myself into working like a demon all the time then I would be just amazing.
I know there are others out there like me but people don't talk about procrastination much. It is a taboo topic. It drives me bananas when people talk about their Christmas shopping and they are finished by October and I am only just starting to think about Christmas gifts. I remember sewing on Christmas eve till three oclock in the morning trying to get dress up clothes finished for daughter #1 and daughter #2 because I had missed the boat and had not been able to order the things they wanted because the store had sold out. So being an idiot, and not wanting to disappoint the daughters, I had decided to sew the costumes instead. See my intentions were good but.....
What I want to know is how can you retrain someone like me? Is it even possible? Am I a hopeless case?
My intentions are good but it is said by some that the road to hell is paved on good intentions. Mind you, it is also said that intention is nine tenths of the law. So where does that leave me... in jail... or on the rooad to hell.... either way I'm hooped! I guess I had better go and turn intention into reality.
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